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Saturday, June 26, 2004

Friendster Lives!

Thursday was the last day of the mainstream school for the year. There was a tearful graduation assembly, happily without 26-minute-speeches-of-baseball-bat-waving. Friday was supposed to be a day of cleaning and training, however, there were about 40 kids who needed something to do. Since I obviously don't need training for summer school, I was one of those recruited for the field trip. Following the field trip was a party for the teachers for the end of the year, so it proved to be an eventful day. In order:

Wake up. Walk to school. Find kids, count kids, clean up spilled coffee. Find bus. Ride bus to the heart of London. Herd kids through aquarium. Herd lost teachers through aquarium. Survive 20-minute walk from aquarium to IMAX theatre. Watch movie. Watch kids straining to touch everything that "comes near" them, thanks to the illusion of 3D. With kids, take over theatre's cafe for an hour. Wander to nowhere, happen accross performance. Watch people crawl into giant slinkies, fall in love, fuck, have a baby, invite kids to pet the baby giant slinky. Return to bus. Return to school. Take kids to park. Set up football match. Immediately call end of football match, return to school. Get rid of kids. Sign cards for leaving teachers.

Relax, catch bus to end-of-year shindig. Try exotic drinks, hobnob with Spanish pop stars and cynical teachers, impress Iranian woman by knowing about Savok, defend my anti-Americanism. Twice. Watch France get knocked out of the European championships on the television. More amusingly, watch the English laugh at the French loss. Eat the best piece of cake at the dessert tray, which was the only one that was chocolate and covered with black-and-rasp-berries. Go back to school with the teachers, being far too amused to sing Monty Python songs.

Follow teachers to 80's club. Observe teachers smoking various things and generally behaving unteacherlike. Explain that, actually, at Antioch parties, hearing Like a Prayer isn't weird, it's actually expected. (Antioch Party - Friday night, 11PM: Hear Like a Prayer, dance semi-ironically, lather, rinse, repeat.) Lose ticket for coatcheck. Still manage to get coat out of coatcheck quite easily. "Actually, it's the red hoodie. No, not the leather jacket. No, not the jean jacket. No, not that thing that might have style. The only hoodie in the place. What does it have in the pocket? An organic cardboard snack. Yeah, that's the one. Thanks!" Leave 80's club.

Follow teachers on hunt for other teachers to a different bar. Fail to find teachers, wait patiently near tables. Make eye contact with pretty Finnish woman. Approached by Finnish woman's friend, who tells me that she quite likes the look of me, and may want to talk to me. Allow myself to be ditched by teachers, for some strange reason. Talk with group of Finns. Explain my anti-Americanism for the third time that day. Manage, amazingly, to not get any contact information from Finnish woman after being told of her interest. However, succeed in talking with the Finnish fellow about Friendster. Give him e-mail address for Friendstering on way to bus stop. Explain my anti-social tendencies to complete stranger who had approached me in a bar for his friend. Ride bus home, collapse in bed 18 hours after leaving.

- Rowan Kaiser, 11:53 AM
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